REAL Time Machine auction on eBay!

- THIS WEEK'S SHENANIGANS -

Real Time Machine!

Recently there was a guy auctioning a "Real Time Machine" on eBay. I had a little fun with him and created this web page so that you folks at home could follow along. I know it was evil, but I swear I just couldn't help myself. Besides, if you're trying to sell someone an empty box for $5000 you get what you deserve, right? ;^)

Props to Daevid for sending me the auction listing in the first place, and to the person that sent this item that I didn't get to work into my story before the fish threw the hook:


Here's the e-mail I've sent to the guy who's selling the time machine, along with his replies and some highly scientific pictures of the device. Wow, no kidding: this really is a REAL time machine, I gotta have it!

Current status: My name is Alby McNanda, I've just sold my car for $2500 and I am waiting for my wife (who is a coal miner) to call me back so that she can send me the rest of the $5000.

Here's the original auction page from eBay: REAL TIME MACHINE


ROUND ONE!

From: "Mike Dailor" <mike@underground80s.com> To: <btreid23@home.com> Sent: Saturday, October 28, 2000 11:20 AM Subject: Time Machine on eBay Hi there, Regarding your time machine aution on eBay: I live in a quite small apartment. Can you please include the dimensions of the time machine in the auction listing? I would hate to purchase it and then find that I cannot see around it to watch TV! Also, do you have a photo available? My decor is early colonial, and I need to see if it will fight with my other furniture. Thank you! Mike Dailor ------------------------------------------------------------------------------- From: "Brian Reid" <btreid23@home.com> To: "Mike Dailor" <mike@underground80s.com> Sent: Saturday, October 28, 2000 2:19 PM Subject: Re: Time Machine on eBay Hi, This is a real time machine. It is about half the size of a laptop and has a powerful magnet. So only one person can go at a time. I am selling the time machine because I never had the guts to use it. (no guts no glory) I have had it five years. I am ready to let someone have it who is really going to use it. I am not sure how safe it is to travel in time. The manufacturer says that people who have bought the other machines generally find a time they like better and usually end up there. We don't know how to extend the period of time past the six hours so I am not sure how they can travel there over extended periods. The value of the machine is relative. If you use it, you can use the knowledge you gain for good purposes or bad purposes or for whatever you want. The bottom line is once you travel in time, you have a different set of priotities and money may not be high on the list. If people believed this machine is real they would pay much much more that $5,000.00. I don't know how to convince them it is real. If someone has an open mind and has researched this area as hard as I have has already know who the manufacturer direct is and can contact them direct. There are no limits when you travel in time. I hope I answered your questions. Good Luck and happy bidding Brian


ROUND TWO!!

From: "Astro Boy" <ab@atomicsoftworks.com> To: <btreid23@home.com> Sent: Saturday, October 28, 2000 06:05 PM Subject: Time Machine Hello, I have a couple of questions about the time machine that you are auctioning on eBay. If I win the auction but the device does not work for me, can I return it for a full refund? The reason that I ask is that there was a time machine advertised in the back of Popular Science in 1994. It was about the size of a lunchbox and it had a strap that you put your wrist through. Is this the same type of device? Because I tried that one but it did not work for me, so that is why I ask about the money-back guarantee. Also, I see in the listing that it must be used near a high energy vortex. I live about a half a block from a really big electrical substation, the kind with the big gray transformers. The wires to the transmission tower run right over the top of my building, but I am on the second floor and it is a six floor building. Is that a sufficient energy source, or do I need to be closer? Thank you very much for your time, I look forward to bidding on your auction. Alby McNanda ------------------------------------------------------------------------------- From: "Brian Reid" <btreid23@home.com> To: "Astro Boy" <ab@atomicsoftworks.com> Sent: Saturday, October 28, 2000 7:10 PM Subject: Re: Time Machine Hi, > If I win the auction but the device does not work for me, can I return it > for a full refund? NO, I don't know if it works I never Tried It. > The reason that I ask is that there was a time machine > advertised in the back of Popular Science in 1994. It was about the sizeof > a lunchbox and it had a strap that you put your wrist through. Is this the > same type of device? I am not aware of that particular device > Because I tried that one but it did not work for me, so > that is why I ask about the money-back guarantee. Sorry no guarantees > Also, I see in the listing that it must be used near a high energy vortex. I > live about a half a block from a really big electrical substation, the kind > with the big gray transformers. The wires to the transmission tower run > right over the top of my building, but I am on the second floor and it is a > six floor building. Is that a sufficient energy source, or do I need to be > closer? The High energy votex is more of a geographical location. There are thousands in the US. I hope I answered your questions. Good Luck and happy bidding Brian


ROUND THREE!!!

From: "Astro Boy" <ab@atomicsoftworks.com> To: <btreid23@home.com> Sent: Saturday, October 28, 2000 07:32 PM Subject: Time Machine - Thank You Hi Brian, Thank you for anwering my questions. I understand now about the energy vortex being a place, I looked it up on the internet. It seems like there are not any of them in the United States of America, though. The two guided-tour websites that I found that will take you to a vortex place talk about Peru and Mexico and India and Egypt. Do you know if there are any energy vortexes in Kentuky, which is where I am at? Also my wife and kids live in Tennesee, maybe there is one there? If not, it looks like I will need to spend $1995 for a guided trip to Peru, which is their cheapest package. Would it be possible for you to include a trip to a vortex with your machine that is cheaper than that? Thank you and God Bless. Alby McNanda

  • Family of Light - shamanic power journeys to energy vortexes worldwide.
  • Shamanic Metaphysical Journeys - to energy vortexes in Peru and other places of power worldwide. ------------------------------------------------------------------------------- From: "Brian Reid" <btreid23@home.com> To: "Astro Boy" <ab@atomicsoftworks.com> Sent: Saturday, October 28, 2000 0:05 PM Subject: Re: Time Machine - Thank You Hi Alby, You don't need to go out of the country. There are thousands of high energy vortexes around the country. an example the entire Chicago area is located in a high energy vortex. I am not sure about Kentucky or Tennesee. Sedona Arizona is one of the strongest around. I hope this helps, Brian

    ROUND FOUR!!!!

    From: "Astro Boy" <ab@atomicsoftworks.com> To: <btreid23@home.com> Sent: Saturday, October 29, 2000 02:48 PM Subject: Arizona! Hi Brian, Wow, Arizona! I always wanted to go there. I think they do the Burning Man there, I saw it on TV the other nite. But my cousin Bob lives in Chicago, so that's probably where we'll do it. But it looks like I have run into a bit of a snag in my fund raising efforts. I sold my car for $2500, and I have some money saved as well, so I am more than half way there. I was going to sell the camper too, but it looks like now we'll need it for Chicago so that was a close thing. My wife and I talked about this way back after the Popular Science machine, and I know that she will give me the rest of the money, but she is at work this weekend and they don't have a phone in the mine. Well not one that she can use anyway, it's an emergency phone. She's got a real nice Sprint PCS phone that we use to keep in touch because the long distance is included in the plan, which is good because she is in Tennesee and I am not, but it doesn't ring when she is in the mine. So I'm sure that she will get the message and call me right back when she comes up, but the auction will be over by then probably. If I can't get the money in time, will you be re-listing the time machine if no one else meets the starting bid? Because I am REALLY INTERESTED! Hey, I talked to my eldest daughter when I couldn't get hold of her mom. She is a real smart-aleck that one, but she's got the brains in the family I think. She said that I obviously did not ever buy the time machine because if I had I would have travelled back in time and left the money to buy it with in the coffee can in the freezer, and since it wasn't there then I didn't time travel. I admit that she had me going there, and I did go and look in the freezer and the money wasn't there, but just because you can time travel doesn't mean that you'll have more money in the future, right? Or maybe I did go back in time but I put the money some place else but now I don't know where I left it. Maybe I should leave myself a note to my future self to leave myself a note to tell my past self where I put the money. Boy, this stuff will sure make your head spin when you think on it, won't it just? Maybe you were right not to try it in the first place! But I am not afraid, I going to DO IT!!! Anyway though, I still want to bid on the machine, I just need to make sure that I have the money first. In the mean time, are there any operating directions or a manual that you can e-mail to me? And I'm pretty sure that I have a picture of the Popular Science machine in the basement that I will send you. Maybe if I had used that one near a High Enegy Vortex it would have worked, but it didn't come with aney instructions. Which is why I ask for instructions for yours. Well Brian take care and Praise Him, I will talk to you when my wife calls. Your Friend, Alby